Jacking people around can be fun, unless you are the person being jacked around. Africans often have too much time, (money,) so they are bored and spend time jacking around people for fun, and profit.
I am Andy Lee Graham, a world traveler, today, August 5, 2015 I am in Kpalime, Togo West Africa working to buy Teak wood, and make it into small wood products to export to the USA, and sell on Amazon.com.
I sent Antoine, a nice half Ghana, half Togolese man out to arrange to purchase wood. When he returned, he told me he stopped and arranged with Komi to buy some wood.
Well, we have a history with Komi. On our first dealing with him, he made an excellent example of a wine tote, so we decided to make 3 other designs, 4 bottles side by side, 6 bottles, and 4 bottles in a row. Seem simple enough, we had already done one, and was familiar with making this small wood product.
However, let me explain, the prices he wanted for the 3 new ones were 4 times higher than the first one, and I was angry. He did the first one at a fair price, on time, and I believed he had decided to make the big money on the next three. Well, I squashed that, and we negotiated the correct price.
What happened after the money discussion was, we ordered it, agreed on Wednesday, he was to have the new wood totes done on Tuesday of next week. On Wednesday of the next week, Antoine calls and says,"Komi, where is the new wine totes?"He replies,"I got busy, I will have them on Friday."
Well, Friday came, and finally Komi fesses up, says he has not even started, and gave many reasons to Antoine why not. We have time invested in him, and for me, it is simple, cut our loss of time, he jacked us around, and we will waste no more time with him, finished, done, erase him from our business.
My 8 Visits to Africa
I have visited West Africa 8 times, mostly in Togo, but also in Ghana, Benin, Ivory Coast, Niger, Mali, Burkina Faso and Senegal. West Africa is invaded, populated by Aid Charity organizations, we call them NGO, non governmental organizations, or in French ONG's. The USA government gives money to countries, and they distributed it, by giving the money to NGO's, who then are to do good work for Africa, give aid, or charity to Africa.
What has Africa learned from Aid, and Charities?
How to nod their heads, act poor, and laugh at the naive, but well intended aid workers. They enjoy the free money, the same as welfare in the USA, or people living on the Dole in Europe. It is not just appreciated, and anyone who give aid, or charity, and believes they are appreciated should understand. someone will sell you a bridge.
Back to Anthony, he went to Komi, and gave him 5000 CFA, and contracted to have him buy Teak.
This sounds rather stupid, after our two other dealing with the man, but not really, it is the essential nature of West Africa, and now in Togo. People say what they are going to do, and seldom, almost never does it occur. If a person says they are coming to visit at 8:00 PM, we learn to be happy when they show up, we are grateful they arrived, to have the arrive early, or on time would seem like a miracle. So, we become accustom to a culture of no results, it is standard behavior and the reason why Africa does not sell products to the world, it is for the most part, a buyer, seldom exports, others than gold, oil, and natural resources.
The other day, one of my YouTube viewers requested I make a video of a factory here in Togo. 10 days later, and I have yet to know of one factory, large employers are not to be found, and there are good reason, it is hard to make money when nobody works. One man or woman can force 2-3 workers to work, then make money, but after that, life is just too difficult, unless you are a company that makes extreme amounts of money like beer, cell phones, or in Africa, the aid organizations. Aid organizations are not required to work, they collect money, the best of the best are great at collecting money, and putting on the face that they achieved some goal.
Jack Around Africa
I will remind you, you are reading this on MyThinkingProblem.com, a web site trying to define dysfunctional behaviors.
What is West Africa? What is Togo, it is a place that does not function, it is not broken, it has never functioned in the modern world. It is country that did great as hunter, gathers, and just do not function well in the modern world.
Or do they, there is a race to the bottom, they counties on the bottom of the HDI, the Human Development Index will receive the most amount of aid per person, so the winners in aid are those countries that need the aid most, because they are the most broken. They function worst.
Jacked Around in the USA
Wasted my time standing in line at Walmart, then discovered the product was out of stock. Everyone has been jacked around, had people waste their time. And, sadly, there are humans that love to do this, who revel in demonstrating they are clever.
In England they call it, "Taking the piss."
In the USA, we can call it, "Winding a person up."
It is teasing another human, and when out of control, it is called being a bully.
Nonetheless, to jack another person around, or to allow another person to jack you around is dysfunctional, it does not achieve the goal. But we have your goal, my goal, and our goal.
1. When you feel confused, back off until you are not confused.
2. Do not listen to excuses, back off, do not deal with the person until clarity returns, until we can see a path, or decision that functions.
3. Have a goal, well defined, clear, with specific time for completion. It you have traveled for 17 years non-stop as me, and visited 107 countries. You will learn that 99 percent of charity workers cannot tell you clear actions, that performed a goal. This is why orphanages are good aid businesses. Simple, clear, and if you build the building, you can show the building, now, as a traveler, finding the orphans inside the orphanage is a problem. I visited one in South America, and all the parents of the "orphans," were at the orphanage. I tried to point out, these are not orphans.
Jacked around in Africa is normal, getting jacked around in the USA is just more organized, and clever. We have all listened to a secretary say,"The boss is out."When we knew 100 percent he or she was in.
When I was in the USA, I had multiple secretaries as a Real Estate Broker, and fired many, when I would say,"no calls."Then, then I would hear on the phone the secretary lie,"Andy left to run some errands."I would say, you must say,"Andy is not available."My reputation, my business, my opinion is of value, only when it can be trusted, I sell the fact that I do not lie, and you cannot make me a liar by association.
I fired most secretaries, the heat of the person on the phone call, and they lied. I kept telling over and over,"Say I am not available."When they refuse to listen,"HANG UP THE FRICKING PHONE."We do business with people with respect, we hang up on people with respect, we do not jack around people, and do not allow them to jack us around. It is all behavior that does not function, it does not achieve the goal.
Here in Africa, I asked Antoine,"Are you trying to waste my time?"He shakes his head, and says,"No,"
I keep saying, let your no be no, and your yes be yes. I was happy to hear no.
I said,"Antoine, I refuse to allow as a friend of your to allow Komi to JACK you around."
And, in Africa, they are rich in food, they suffer from the "resource curse," so when they are bored, they jack people around for fun, and waste our time for fun, it is what people do when bored, they revel in the power of controlling others, for fun, and games.
Just say no, and kick the butt of a few charity organizations today, and ask them, "What is your specific action today?""When will you exit Africa, South America?"
How do we measure success in life? Maybe the best is to say, "I have nobody in my life that jacks me around, who plays ping pong inside my heard."
I am not allow people to use my brain bandwidth for their pleasure.
I love Togo, West Africa, I have extremely good boundaries, and willing to back them up with the "Eye of the Tiger," and more when needed. LOL
Andy Lee Graham in Hotel Saint Bernard, Room 204, Kpalime, Togo West Africa
August 5, 2015
I am willing to tell people to leave me alone, are you? Or do you hide?
Go out and conquer the world, but as people of honor, as gentlemen, and ladies, or as they say in French,"Bien gentil."
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